Tanis’ Story

I have vascular dementia, but you can’t tell that by looking at me. When I’m out in the community, I’m not afraid to tell people I have dementia so I can get the help I need. If I’m struggling with something, such as finding a product in the store, I tell the clerk. I’ve found that people are happy to help.

I’ve noticed changes in myself over the years, but I am managing and living well. I’m still independent and live on my own, and I have my support group at the Alzheimer Society I look forward to attending each week. I mark off the support group days in my calendar with big, red circles.

This support group has been a lifesaver for me. I’ve attended for many years now and the great leadership and deep friendships I’ve formed have helped to keep my spirit strong.

I wish more people understood that they can talk to someone with dementia. We want to be treated well… we don’t want to be treated as though we’re different from anyone else.

I don’t understand why there is such a stigma associated with the word “forget.” Why is it so bad to forget something? There’s nothing to be ashamed of. Let’s get rid of this stigma so that when people do forget or are struggling to remember something, they feel comfortable asking for help.

I do whatever I can to help others understand dementia a little better. Once others see us as people who just need a little help sometimes, they’ll see us as who we truly are, individuals living their lives in their own way with dementia.

Here are my tips to help others navigating dementia:

  • Develop a support system that you can rely on. You will be able to share your feelings and count on others who can help you.
  • Ask for information or a second opinion – people are often glad to help.
  • Cherish every moment you share and every memory you have with your family members.
  • Be patient and compassionate. Your family members may take some time to understand the many changes brought about by the disease.
  • Life can be crazy. Take your time and take care of yourself as you face your challenges.